CAST: Sly Leeds Valentino Phil --- full page panel of Valentino wading through the mess in Sly's bedroom. You couldn't tell the floor from the garbage that's accumulated on it. --- Valentino's foot runs up against Charlie, a large, brown, stuffed bear, about 3 feet tall V:Hmm? Valentino holds up Charlie like a sack of flour. S:Yeah, that one's-- V:Howdy there! S:I call him Charlie. He's-- V:Boy! He's a big one! Camera focuses on a strange wet, matted spot on Charlie S:Yeah, he's one of my favorites! Reaction shot of Valentino looking at Charlie S:He's kind of the, uh, the main one I-- Valentino drops Charlie and retracts his arms in disgust V:Ooh! Eeesh, my mistake S:Cudd-- S:Wait a sec-- V:Hey, no judgement. Everybody's got their thing. Valentino starts to change his gloves V:I know there's those internet forums-- S:NO!!! --- Sly is indignant. S:That is S:NOT S:what I use Charlie for. S:He is STRICTLY for cuddling. V:Oh. Beat, Valentino is wishing someone would help him out of this awkward situation by shooting him in the head V:My mistake, I just noticed, the... V:...uh... V:...wet spot here, and... S:Oh, that's just from crying a lot. V:...Alright. --- The action moves into the living room, in a similar rough state to the bedroom V:Thank you for being cooperative. V:Believe it or not, a lot of folks don't take too kindly to strange men showing up and throwing their stuff away. S:It's fine. S:'S not your fault. Valentino is bending over and picking up garbage V:You know, V:Your brother's really worried about you. S:I know. V:He wouldn't call us if it wasn't serious. S:I know. S:I know I'm not, uh, really good at... S:...at living. I'm not, I don't-- S:There's something wrong with me. I can't keep things clean, can't hold down a job S:can't get out of the fucking /bed/ somedays. Valentino has no clue what to do in this situation S:There's something broken in my head. I'm a total fucking idiot. I'm not suited to live in this world. Beat of Valentino --- V:Well, it looks like the living room and the bedroom are going to be the worst of it. After me and the boys clear the place out, we'll probably be out of your hair after giving the floor a vacuum and a mop. V:'long as we don't find anything too nasty. S:Um... S:Could you make sure, uh -- if it isn't too much trouble -- could you please not throw out any of my plushies? V:Can't make any promises, but as long as none of them have anything gross growing on them, I won't chuck 'em. Shot of horse plushie being revealed under a mountain of hoard. It's in a very sorry state, gross, covered in filth and various stains, with a mushroom growing out of its eye V:Shit. --- Phil holds the fungal horse plushie P:Hope you didn't have any plans today. P:This stuff spreads like kudzu, we'll probably have to disinfect this whole place S:*gasp* S:You found Shellie! Phil flippantly holds the horse plush mushroom-side out V:Oy. P:Hey, you gotta be careful, it gets real humid 'round here, and there're a lot of funguses that can grow in dank spots in your house. S:Is she gonna be alright? P:What, this thing? We're just gonna throw it out. S:B-but, isn't there anything you can do? V:I'm sorry, kid, but you gotta throw that thing out. You've got plenty of other stuffed animals in better condition, right? Sly starts to cry S:I-I guess... it's just... S:*sniff* I hadn't seen her in so long, and S:a-and I was really worried about her-r Sly is choking back tears, trying to seem like an adult in front of two grown men, who already know she's crying over a stuffed animal S:Can I at least say goodbye? --- Sly holds Shellie tenderly in her hands S:Bye, Shellie... S:I'm sorry I left you for so long... I didn't mean to let a weird mushroom grow on you... Valentino and Phil looking at Sly S:I really missed you... P:Damn, you really meet all kinds in this job, huh, Val? Valentino is ignoring Phil, talking to Sly V:So, her name was Shellie? S:Yeah. V:Do they come with names? S:Some of them. Most of them, I give them names. --- S:*sniff* h-here. Sly hands the horse back to Valentino Val holds the horse, feeling an unexpected sense of melancholy P:I'll get the fungicide. Panel of the clear blue sky, a small tuft of cloud on the right side Panel of Valentino looking up while hauling two trash bags out of the house on his back Valentino throws the bags into a dumpster. You can also see Phil coming out of the house with two trash bags, and Sly off to the side of the door. --- S:I'm sorry, I know it got really bad. V:Don't worry about it, I've had worse. P:Yeah, believe you me, three dumpsters and a little bit of fungus is nothin'. P:Remember the poopocalypse? V:Oh God, that house. P:Lady had four cats, let them have free reign of the place. P:There was cat shit *everywhere*, and that was on top of all the normal debris you'd expect. V:Sometimes *literally* on top. V:...The point is, we've seen it all. This is just a Thursday for us. S:D-do you know why people... S:Why *I* let it get that bad? V:Well, you're probably gonna have to talk to a psychologist about that one. I'm just a cleaner. V:My guess... V:I think it's mostly inertia. Something starts it for them -- some seed of depression or exhaustion -- and then, living like that just starts to feel normal. V:And every time it gets worse, instead of solving it, they just adapt to it, opening the door for the problem to continue to get worse. --- Sly looks heartbroken and overwhelmed Valentino notices and gets nervous, because society doesn't teach people like him how to deal with other people's negative emotions V:B-but on the plus side, look at this as an opportunity! V:Everything's clean! You can start over now, keep your house in better condition. S:Y-yeah... Sly doesn't believe this is going to last. She scoops her fist in a half-hearted "hurrah" motion. (I have not been able to figure out how to describe the gesture I am going for) Valentino wants to believe this will last, but his experience is fighting his faith in his fellow person. He imitates the gesture, a little more hopefully. V: --- Sly looks up to the sky, panel framed with her in the center from bird's-eye view The clear blue sky, with two tufts of white cloud --- The final page is a view of inside the garbage bag. In the center is poor Shellie, with the mushroom still in her eye.